Victims of spinal cord injuries often face many anxieties and worries when returning home. This is to be expected after having spent months in a hospital or rehabilitation unit. The emotions may be a combination of excitement, uncertainty, confusion, and even fear. The transition from hospital to home can be a daunting one, and although every patient has an individual experience, there is most often a barrage of feelings to work through.
This article will concentrate on ways to turn anxieties of returning to a familiar place into positives, how to combat the negative feelings towards it, and other tips for the first day home after a spinal cord injury. Throughout the entirety of these tips, it is crucial to keep in mind that this experience, for anybody, can be harrowing and that emotional responses are normal, and by no means an indication of weakness toward recovery.
Learning to accept privacy at home may be a little skewed for a while
Coming home after rehabilitation or a stay in hospital will bring many things with it - including nurses, doctors, and medical professionals who will be continuing your treatment at home. Whether they are assisting with mobility, a continence regime, or otherwise, you may feel your home is not your own for some time.
This can be hard on everybody in the house - including family members - when there is a constant flow of people in and out of the house. It is, however, important to remember that these people are there to help you learn more about how best to help yourself when back in your own familiar surroundings; something that will only aid the journey towards independence.
Don’t expect too much of yourself and take each day at a time
However cliche it may sound, coming home after a spinal cord injury is going to bring up some challenges, and so taking each day as it comes is wise. Whether physically or mentally, setting yourself goals will encourage you to celebrate those all important little triumphs and achievements. Everything can seem like an obstacle, so appreciating the little things and taking your time with them is really important.
When you first get home, you may feel a little out of your depth, even in a familiar location like your own house. Having medical professionals in your home, teaching you skills and techniques to assist you in being independent again may even make you feel like a child. Remember though that these things once took some time to learn, and will once again require that time to regain.
Frustration is to be expected. However, by practicing patience and taking your time to work through your challenges, you will slowly begin to regain the skills and abilities you once had, albeit perhaps in a slightly different manner. Taking your time may feel extremely slow and aggravating, but in the long run, avoiding injury by rushing movement, and your recovery in general, will serve you well in your journey.
Create your own methods and procedures
One thing patients with an injury of this nature sometimes say, is that returning home means they can regain more control. This includes the ability to do things when you want, rather than when the hospital or rehabilitation program dictates. Having your own bathroom or bedroom, or even just belongings to call your own, may make you feel more settled and comfortable.
Having learned more about living with independence at home in regards to your medical care, you may find having your own procedures, lists, or orders of things helpful. They may also give you a sense of control and order. This aids some people in gaining back that crucial independence that may have been lost during the rehabilitation and/or injury period.
Try and talk to people
When, and only when, you feel ready, try and talk about your experiences regarding your injury, how it feels to be home, and anything else you feel like to your friends, family, and peers. Whether or not you fully realize at the time, talking can be such a productive and helpful tool in order to move forward and come to terms with your injury. In fact, you may find it helps those who are closest to you to understand what you are going through and help them talk about how they feel too.
For those who have access to it, therapy or counseling can be an invaluable tool to offload frustrations and find productive and helpful ways to move forward in recovery. This may also help you to realize you are more than your disability. It can be easy to become disheartened during this difficult and frustrating period of recovery, however being able to speak to somebody who sees past your disability may be a breath of fresh air.
Using forums like Apparelyzed.com will help you speak to others who have similar experiences, which you may not have access to when at home. In rehabilitations centers and hospitals, you likely had access to people who were in similar circumstances to talk to, whereas, at home, you may start to miss having those like-minded people. SCI forums are a great way to connect across long distances.
Remove things which may upset you
Having just been discharged, you may still be discovering how you feel, and working through understanding what has happened to you. You may still be grieving for the life you had before your spinal cord injury, and that is normal.
There is no time limit as to how long it will take you to come to terms with everything you are experiencing now. You may have things around your home which serve as painful reminders of things you used to enjoy doing; perhaps a sport, or something which required an ability you don’t have right now. It might be wise to temporarily remove these obstacles, things that may make your grieving process harder than it needs to be.
Be accepting of changes
Your home may need some adaptations or modification in order to make it the most suitable and helpful for your recovery. Change is hard and suffering from a spinal cord injury is probably more change in your life than you’ve experienced before. Making changes to what is probably a safe and familiar place to you might be difficult, but it is important you try and accept that these changes are for the better.
Being patient with your loved ones
Although this major change in life is happening to you, it would be unfair to fail to acknowledge that it will also be a massive change for your friends and family. They, of course, wish to help and support you in whichever way is best, but they will also be adjusting and coming to terms with your injury.
Unless they too have experienced a spinal cord injury, the chances of them knowing how you feel are very slim, so remember they might not instinctively understand how to respond or act around you for some time. Appreciate that they want to do best by you, but just may not know how.
Be at peace with asking for help
It is easy to feel proud and against asking for help. You might feel like people pity you because of your injuries and/or disability. However, there may be a point in which you must accept that sometimes (and probably even a lot of times), you will need a little help. This doesn’t make you weak, or mean that you’ve failed. In fact, it takes a strong person to know when they need assistance and be able to ask for it.
Enjoy being home after a spinal cord injury
Essentially, when coming back home, it is key to remember that everything you are experiencing is OK. Nothing is ‘weird’ or ‘weak.’ In fact, facing up to your emotions takes a strong individual! Having gone through what is probably the biggest ordeal of your life, it is a very likely you will not simply take it in your stride.
Home is something familiar, and to return to it after such a life-changing event, and in such different circumstances, will be overwhelming, emotional, and tough. Remembering that the worst is already over, and all you can look forward to is progress, will eventually become an exciting prospect.
